🧠Weekly Mind Sweep #95| What’s On My Mind | Failure
October 2023
Week 92: Curated Conversation; Failure
Week 93: Mind Your Business; Failure
Week 94: Manage Your Mind; Failure
*Week 95: What’s On My Mind; Failure
New to the Weekly MindSweep? Past issues live here.
Let’s sweep the brain…
2014 - Age 8
I would take my identical twin boys apple-picking at local farms when they were little.
It was a full day of cool weather, flannel shirts, and apple cider donuts. When they were younger, they'd return home exhausted from all the available activities. (This, of course, was by design, so they'd pass out at 6 p.m.!)
When they were a little older, they learned that different kinds of trees grew different types of apples. They would follow the signs to the apples of their choice, proudly pick their favorites, and enjoy the first bite in the field under the tree, often claiming that their variety was the best and arguing all the way back to the car.
Back in the 13th century, when the word "failure" entered the dictionary and was defined as a lack of success, there were six varieties of apples.
A lot has changed since then.
Now, we have over 7,500 apple varieties. You can technically send a loved one to the store to buy "apples," but you will likely be disappointed when they return with their favorite variety, not the one you had hoped for.
Humans make up words and give them meaning.
Once we’re aware of the power of our words and how we use them (or don't), we can learn to communicate more clearly and choose what and how we use them. We of course do not have control on how they are received.
Failure is a perspective.
When my washer machine stopped working and spilled water all over my basement floor, I defined the washer machine as a failure. Something inside the machine didn't work in its intended manner.
As an entrepreneur, when I put an offer into the market and it doesn't sell, it's not a failure. From my perspective, it's an experiment and an opportunity to learn more information about what the market is looking for.
Both situations don't feel very good when they happen. [*1]
Emotions come up; feelings from past experiences come up, and our brain goes into action to keep us safe. All normal.
It's what you do after that.
And that is a choice you make.
You can judge yourself or others based on the 13th-century definition of failure. Or, you can see that the words we use have various meanings.
The choice is yours.
Rethink failure.
Are you an entrepreneur in business that could use support?
A place for my digressions.
[*1] I know the Huberman Lab podcast episodes are a time commitment, but his latest episode with Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett about emotions is #MINDBLOWN - Link below!
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Anchored
An intense conversation, a spat with a partner, or even an obnoxious tweet—these situations aren’t life-or-death, yet we often react as if they are. That’s because our bodies treat most perceived threats the same way. Yet one approach has proven to be incredibly effective in training our nervous system to stop overreacting and start responding to the world with greater safety and ease: Polyvagal Theory.
In Anchored, expert teacher Deb Dana shares a down-to-earth presentation of Polyvagal Theory, then brings the science to life with practical, everyday ways to transform your relationship with your body. Using field-tested techniques, Dana helps you master the skills to become more aware of your nervous system moment to moment—and change the way you respond to the great and small challenges of life.
What I’m listening to:
Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett: How to Understand Emotions
In this episode, my guest is Dr. Lisa Feldman Barrett, Ph.D., a Distinguished Professor of Psychology at Northeastern University who is a world expert in the science of emotions. She explains what emotions are and how the brain represents and integrates signals from our body and the environment around us to create our unique emotional states. We discuss the relationship between emotions and language, how our specificity of language impacts our emotional processing, the role of facial expressions in emotions, and how emotions relate to sleep, movement, nutrition and the building and reinforcement of social bonds. We also discuss actionable tools for how to regulate feelings of uncertainty and tools to better understand the emotional states of others. This episode ought to be of interest to anyone curious about the neuroscience and psychology underlying emotions and for those who seek to better understand themselves and relate to others and the world in richer, more adaptive ways.
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