🔥Weekly Mind Sweep #56 | What’s On My Mind | Ego
January 2023
Week 53: Curated Conversation; Ego
Week 54: Mind Your Business; Ego
Week 55: Manage Your Mind; Ego
*Week 56: Contemplation; What’s On My Mind: My Thoughts On Ego
Now, let’s sweep the brain…
Fast forward to a sunny Friday in February, and you are en route to an event with like-hearted women in business. You're excited to experience the energy of being together in a room with phenomenal women you adore.
(Wait, should I go back on tour this spring?)
You've been anticipating this day for weeks!
After navigating your home streets, you enter the on-ramp of your closest major highway. As you accelerate, you take a quick look in the rear-view mirror, and the road is relatively quiet. You check the driver's side mirror, and the coast seems clear. You're confident you will slide right on the freeway, maintaining a reasonable pace. You press the turn signal indicator as you begin to merge onto the highway.
All of a sudden, you hear HOOOOOONNNNNNKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!!!!
A large red pickup truck swerves around you as the two of you meet in the same lane simultaneously. You swerve to miss them and regain control in the low-speed lane.
Your heart is racing; the adrenaline is pumping through your body.
You may immediately think, "What a JERK! Didn't they see me on the on-ramp entering the highway!" You carefully stay in the right lane, thankful you didn't crash. You can feel your heartbeat in your head, heart, and hands.
Staying in the slower lane, you take a deep breath to calm your nervous system and return to being present in your body. "Phew, that was scary!"
Now, safely on the highway, you are calmer and begin to replay the chain of events in your mind. A moment of clarity clicks when you realize it.
You forgot to take extra precautions to check the blind spot.
It was you. You were the problem.
As a curious, wise, and intelligent woman, I'd imagine you feel similar to me in that our ego conversation has been enlightening. I would also add words like challenging, fun, and an exciting way to start the year!
(Are there words you would add to this experience?)
Working through the topic of ego these past few weeks has allowed me to be more honest and insightful. It has also allowed me to work with the continuous practice of the power of the pause.
I've even been brave in asking for support when unsure if my ego is at play. Your ego is a guide. Sometimes, even when you prepare, take time for due diligence, and check the blind spot, you can still make a wrong turn.
Welcome to the human condition.
As I review the past few weeks' conversations, here's what's on my mind.
Week one - Who am I?
Ego gets a bad rap. If you stop your research at only reading the definition in the dictionary, you're bound to miss the value it can bring to your life. I'm eternally grateful for the opportunity to bring this conversation to the table and your willingness to have deeper, meaningful conversation with me.
Working more profoundly in a community with like-hearted women is a gift.
As with most things in life, as well as my motto to my teen boys is "everything in moderation." We need the ego to be willing to show up.
We need our ego antenna to be raised for the awareness that we might be heading in the right direction. But on the other hand, a lack of ego can bring meekness, being too humble, and being taken advantage of by others, which isn't ideal.
Confident Humility
Week two - Chickity Check Yo'self
It's conscious and unconscious, personal and public, past and present.
Balance is hard. As entrepreneurs, we work a little harder because we need to be confident enough that we CAN do this thing and be successful in supporting ourselves. We must be humble enough to know that we don't know what we don't know and be willing to be vulnerable in the arena and check ourselves - before we wreck ourselves.
The only way to get better is with practice.
Week three - Struggles are part of the human condition.
The brain is capable of changing. The beauty of all of this?
We CAN learn, we CAN change, we CAN grow.
If we are willing to do the work.
It can be easy to point the finger away from ourselves or blame the ego, the moon, and the stars. However, it's more challenging to shine a light within, deep into your blind spots and take proper accountability for moving about this world within the human experience.
It can be challenging to gain insight, awareness, and the willingness to release control of what isn't yours to hold.
It can be humbling to listen to our ego in confidence, and set expectations of the outcome, only to realize what happened was here to teach us something.
I’m right on time and so are you.
Three things I've learned.
The ego is everywhere, in everything and in everyone.
My curiosity has deepened, and the ego will remain a lifelong learning opportunity.
I don't think I'm interested in achieving "ego death," but I haven't figured out if that's my ego talking.
Three things you can do.
When you see it in others, pause and see what it may trigger in yourself.
A stroked ego could be the push you need to stretch yourself further. Pause to question your true intention. Ask someone you trust in a community to hold the mirror up and point out the blind spots.
Find a way to bring meditation into your daily routine. It doesn’t mean you have to spend hours on a mat. You can rewire your brain with short, mindful, grounding exercises! (Did you know about the 1% on Marco Polo?) https://bit.ly/Chickbook1percent
The 1% Project is a collaboration with Virginia L’Bassi and Robin Thomas. We use an app called Marco Polo to each show up once a day with a tool for grounding, self regulation and questions to chickety check yo’self, Monday - Friday. (You get to practice on your own Saturday and Sunday. Join us!
Where to find me
EVERY MONDAY: 8 am - Curated Conversation - Zoom
THINK TWICE: Did you miss our Live ? I’ve got you, the replay is available inside the Chickbook Creative Community. Are you NOT A MEMBER YET?! Join the group, here.
MISS MY VOICE? Check out recent podcast episodes.
What I’m reading
Immunity to Change | Robert Kegan & Lisa Laskow Lahey
It all started with two Brene Brown Podcast with co-author Lisa Lahey. This book is DENSE and INTENSE.
But a few of us are reading it and looking forward to discussing it together. If the book feels overwhelming, we’d still love to have you chat about what we learn.
Let me know you're interested in being a part of the conversation!
Current Collaborations
THINK TWICE: Did you miss our Live on Friday? I’ve got you, the replay is available inside the Chickbook Creative Community. Are you NOT A MEMBER YET?! Join the group, here.
Catalyst for Change, Jamie Chapman.
In other news…
Feeling #FOMO about Curated Conversations? Join us!